Hi my name is Sammi and I am a mother, a dreamer, a traveler and a believer. Well that’s what my Instagram says anyway. More than that I am a survivor and a Mental Health Recovery Warrior.
Struck by the arms of anxiety and the shackles of depression. I lived over a decade buried beneath the surface from the age of 16. I was like a wee bulb pushed down in the dark, with the earth being packed on top of me, no respite from the pain and angst of an unwell mind. In my mid 20s I narrowly missed entering the 27 club and seeked help from a private institution where I learnt the art of mindfulness and the ability to radically accept my past. My roots started to plant themselves in a solid foundation of recovery and sunlight and water came in the sense of support people and sobriety. I soon learnt that it is the little things in life that really matter and that it was a simple life for me.
Jimi Hunt once said in a live show that the key to staying healthy is brutal f%&@ing honesty and this is how I now live my life. I am honest in every aspect of my day, I seek help when I am feeling overwhelmed and storm clouds gather in my mind and I treasure the achievements, however small they are. I find through giving gratitude I can find a little sunshine is every day.
I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder with depressive tendencies. When I first heard this label, I was scared at being judged and hid it from the world. I isolated myself and put on a mask to save my dignity as I didn’t want to be that girl with the mental illness, I also self medicated with alcohol and could be found on the dance floor all night and then hidden beneath he blankets during the day. It has taken time but a few years on now and I view my label as a gift. I have so much more empathy and awareness of how others are feeling, I am able to participate in community events that celebrate difference and inspire others to be open about there struggles as the truth will set you free. The wee bulb has grown and flourished and now others can see its beauty of a flower.
I am now a Mother, a dream of mine and I hope that with my lived experience I will raise my son in a loving, empathic an honest home where there is no problem to large and he will always feel safe.
My mantras that I keep close to my heart are “you are enough” and “this to shall pass”
Love and light